Hi there!

Hi! Welcome to my corner of the internet. I'm a 26 year old therapist, feminist, photographer, and shop owner currently living in Seattle, Washington. My shop, Dealign with Feelings, is geared toward destigmatizing and normalizing mental health. I'm biased, but I think we have some pretty cute stuff :) Click the "shop" tab to see what we've got! I mainly post about my travel and daily life on here. With other random musings thrown in. I post more frequently (and about more feminism) on my Instagram @emmycoletti, so make sure you're following me there. Thanks for stopping by!

Wednesday, October 3, 2012

grand romantic gestures don't exist and it makes me sad

two scoops? or goodbye waist?

previous to Jenn Blosil

during Jenn Blosil

there is a light that never goes out. literally.

I just want to get out of here you guys. Like, when I think about really hard, it's actually really great here. I mean, there are shows every weekend and open mic nights and the perfect cinema for movie hopping. There's the international films every night and there's decent cocoa on my walk to class. It's cooling down too, before we know it winter will be here and I will be able to bring out the Spirit Hood. Ask me if I'm excited.

It just doesn't fit, though. Neither does Seattle. Chicago does right now in my head, which is stupid because I've never been there. What is this feeling? Like, maybe it's just this weird transition stage. Everything is actually wonderful, there's just this underlying nagging feeling that I'm not where I'm supposed to be. Is that normal?

I met a cool boy. He's nice and refrigerates candy bars. I think he's a fitting person to my life. Which is nice, because all of my other friends are failing miserably right now. Mean people... I just don't get them.

Anyways, I swear I will take some more interesting photos soon. I plan on exploring the area. Pear haps a hike? Or maybe a bay walk? Or a midnight picnic with myself because there is no one to have one with?

Yes to all of the above. Yay for solitude.

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and i was happy

Today, I went to this guy's apartment. I wanted to text someone about it, so I could have a discussion about how not everyone here is supporting the stereotype I have in my head. So, I texted my friend who went on to tell me his pessimistic views on people. I wanted to text my other friend, but didn't for some reason. I realized I had no one else to text about this.

I went to my room and started reading Across The Wire. I fell asleep and missed my sculpting class. I woke up and saw my India wall. I looked at all the photos of the kids and remembered how they automatically loved us and just thought about how this world is so broken sometimes. I mean, it's not really broken, not at the core at least. But, I feel like the people I'm surrounded by sometimes are broken. Or they want to be or something. I don't understand that. If you can go through life loving everyone and believing everything is positive, wouldn't you choose that over thinking everyone and everything is terrible? I mean, sure, there are some of both, but you don't have to focus on the negative.

I don't know. I guess I am writing to you, Cyberspace. Because I know you won't talk back. And I have no one else to write to. And even if no one knows this new URL, I'm still not announcing it anywhere. People who want to find this blog, will find this blog, and that's alright with me.

Well, I'm off to finish reading. Just... try to love each other, ok? This world will never make it if we don't at least try.

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Monday, October 1, 2012

apologies on napkins

+more photos from open mic night

You know, that night I felt like I didn't belong. Not the real slice of me, at least. Like, a slice was there and that slice was real and having fun and being authentic. But, then there was another slice that just knew there was more out there, more that I was supposed to do and discover. It was almost like this weird internal pressure from both slices. One just kept saying: "No, this is it. This is where you belong. You'll see, Emmy. One day you'll wake up and everything will flow and you'll realize that this is what you were meant to do all along." But, the other one kept saying: "Leave. Just get up and leave. This is sad and this is stupid and you don't need to be here. You don't want to be here. You need to go to that other place. You don't belong here. Quit trying to force pieces that aren't meant to be."

And then I just sat there, like I always sit there. I couldn't move, because I didn't know what move to make. So, I just sat there and didn't move at all. And my life didn't move at all and neither did my progression as a person. Now I've decided I need to move. I dare me to move. Maybe Switchfoot had it right this whole time. I'm not going to get anywhere sitting here. I mean that figuratively, literally, and emotionally. 

It's time to get things going. I mean, really going. It's time to go to the gallery stroll by myself and drink a cocoa. It's time to go to ET and Frankenstein and take a trip to Chicago over Christmas break and hike somewhere and go on a walk to the bell tower at two in the morning and make a delicious meal all for myself just because I can. It's time to say no to people when they ask me for things and to realize liars are always going to be liars and crazy people are always going to be crazy people. Yes, people can change, but that doesn't mean they always do. Not in a short time, at least.

So, basically all that's happening right now is this: I am throwing pieces of myself into cyberspace because there is no one to talk to. And you know what? That's the way I want it. 


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