Hi there!

Hi! Welcome to my corner of the internet. I'm a 26 year old therapist, feminist, photographer, and shop owner currently living in Seattle, Washington. My shop, Dealign with Feelings, is geared toward destigmatizing and normalizing mental health. I'm biased, but I think we have some pretty cute stuff :) Click the "shop" tab to see what we've got! I mainly post about my travel and daily life on here. With other random musings thrown in. I post more frequently (and about more feminism) on my Instagram @emmycoletti, so make sure you're following me there. Thanks for stopping by!

06/04/18

Monday, June 4, 2018




And I loveddddd social work school because all of us were on the same page. Like something would happen in politics and we were all there, ya know? Or like when discussing social issues we all agreed. And as a liberal in Utah, I have never had that experience before. Where I feel I am with the majority of the population. Much of my life was (and now is) standing awkwardly on the side of some conversation because I didn't agree with what they were talking about (or being inauthentic and agreeing and being mad at myself later).

And I guess that's what I'm really upset about, if we're digging deep. I'm upset that I'm the minority, black sheep, radical, weirdo liberal again. I miss my people, ya know? I miss walking into a room and knowing that everyone in that room valued everything I valued. Knowing they had all the same opinions I had. I miss knowing that I could say something, and everyone agreed down to their bones with me. They were't just politely showing acceptance, but they truly felt the same way.

It was the first time in my life I felt what (some) people here in Utah must feel:
belonging.

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I don't belong in Utah and I never have. I can enjoy it on a vacation and appreciate it's beauty from far away. But I don't fit here.

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Just in writing this, I have found myself editing what I want to say for fear of offending people. And I realize how ridiculous that is!! Unless I am specifically calling Joe Schmoe and asshole, why should someone be offended by my sadness and anger?? Like I am supposed to feel this, right? Wouldn't I be a weird creepy robot if I didn't feel sadness and anger? WHY are we so intolerant of other people's negative emotions? It's so weird to me. And I feel it a lot in Utah. Connecticut and New York were awesome because people were ALWAYS talking about how they felt. They weren't afraid to be sad or mad. They just were however they were, and I thought that was really beautiful.

I struggle in Utah because there is some cultural rule that you can't show negative emotions. So for me to be over here FEELING STUFF is like, a thing, ya know? I think this cultural rule is totally poisoning everything and making people depressed but WHAT DO I KNOW SO LONG AS I LOOK FINE.

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Anyway, I am trying harder to be authentic so that's what this is. Is it still socially acceptable to share deep feelings on the internet? Yes? What if I am 24 years old? Still yes? Ok, good. Because I am HERE you guys. These next few years are gonna be rough and I feel like writing helped me a lot before. There will be people who will be judge-y about me being real and that's ok. I'm not asking anyone to stay and read. If it makes you mad/sad, unfollow me and move on with life.

But on the other hand, this is LIFE. What use is this blog if it's all curated photos and happiness? Like maybe if I am back to my influencer prime (lol) but where I'm at now I just want to be a real person.

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So here I am.

In all my flawed, anxious, depressed, Utah hating glory.

AND IT FEELS GOOD.

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